Sunday, February 24, 2008

The Annual Sylvia Awards

As I was talking with my sis the other day (that would be V for Victorious). We started disgusting, oops I mean discussing the Academy Awards. That's the show on TV that ended the writers strike and lets the worlds most famous (or would that be infamous) megalomaniacs flaunt themselves before their adoring fans. They choose among themselves the best and brightest ( the ones with the most clout or points obtained from who knows where) to receive awards. You know all this already so I won't assault your intelligence any further. The point is, that they choose, and then tell the world that this is the best they have to offer. I beg to differ. So here for the first time ever, I present the first annual (the theme from Star Wars plays) Sylvia Awards! I know what your thinking... who cares? That however, sounds kind of like a personal problem; so here it goes anyway.

Best Musical Score goes to .............. Hairspray

Let's face it, that was a really fun movie, it made you smile the whole time you were watching . The girl who played the lead, Tracy Turnblad, was so happy that you wanted to bottle some of it up to take home with you. If a movie makes you want to sing along, it must be the best. Kind of like another winner "The Sound of Music". It's hard to believe that a movie like The Sound of Music could ever have received one of those OTHER awards. It wouldn't in this day and age.

Best Choreography goes to......................Stardust

You know that scene where the dead brother is sword fighting with the hero. I thought that was great, how did they do it? It was also extremely funny in a dark and weird way.

Best Screenplay Adaption from a book (have you noticed that almost all the screenplays are from books these days) goes to..........Bourne Ultimatum

If any of you have ever read Robert Ludlum's books, and I don't like to speak ill of the dearly departed, but good grief they were often boring and long. I thought they did a great job of moving the story along and making the fans long for more. It helps when you have an action star who can actually act.

Best Actress goes to........Amy Adams

How can anyone resist a princess who is so happy and clueless. She can sing rats and bugs into doing the dirty work and make darling clothing from anything at hand. You've got to love that.

Best supporting actress............John Travolta

Talk about getting in touch with his feminine side. I thought he was great as a woman and I think he should make it permanent (just joking John).

Best actor............Matt Damon

Is anybody else out there metaphorically holding their breath to find out what happens next to Jason Bourne?

Best supporting actor..............What's his name? You know, the guy who plays Severus Snape in Harry Potter. Oh yea..............Alan Rickman

He is so oily and creepy that you want to wash your hair after watching him.

On a side note, I thought that Daniel Radcliffe's acting was almost good in The Order of the Phoenix.

Now the best movie of 2007...................Stardust

Fun, weird, reality based, oops, I meant non-reality based. It had romance, action, good, evil, and a lot of dead brothers. In short, everything you'd ever want in a movie sans Jimmy Stewart.

Here I am presenting the Sylvia Award to Matt Damon

Well, that's it for the Sylvia Awards until next year (if I like any of them, and so far it's not looking too good).